I don’t promise to prepare you for everything, but here are five things to expect when you are expecting.

Surprises every day –

Every baby is different. How your body and mind reacts to the needs of motherhood is different from other mothers or books. Be ready to toss everything you have read about feeding, changing, bathing or putting the baby to sleep. Get creative and save energy to solve problems everyday. Some small problems, some big. Everytime you get a hang of it, the baby behavior changes. It is growing so fast and changing habits so fast that you cannot expect consistency of any form.

People interfere –

Relatives who are there to support will interfere. Husband and family will judge and advise you on everything. They say that your husband is on your team and he should be your biggest support. This is expected, but doesn’t happen often. Even though everyone involved is clueless, the blame and attention are heavily on the mother. Somehow, the people around are less forgiving of the mother’s mistakes. Expect interference in most decisions and do not get carried away. In the end, the mother or parents need to make the final decision.

Finances get burdened –

The basic needs are quite affordable in today’s society: Diapers, milk and some clothes to start with. The overwhelming amount of products beyond basic needs is the ones that need to be treated safely. For us, a carry belt was one of the most useful purchases we made. The extra medical expenses, the home utilities and the good-to-have baby items started adding to the expenses. Fortunately, I have spent a lot of time understanding minimalism and focusing on the necessary expenses. This helped me ditch the marketing gimmicks that overwhelm most parents.

Breastfeeding struggles –

There is no rulebook on how to breastfeed because no one knows what the mother’s body or the baby wants. Latching troubles, milk generation problems, back problems, sleep issues, pumping or not, etc. There are a dozen decisions to make just around breastfeeding. Every guideline is far from reality. Be ready for a lot of physical and emotional turmoil around feeding. Whether you choose to feed or supplement, go easy on yourself.

Communication gaps –

Due to the mountain of changes in and around you, the communication gaps might increase with yourself and with others. This is often the root cause of depression and anxiety among mothers. Build a support system that can offer a listening ear without judgment. Share the moments of overwhelm with your husband regularly and reflect daily regarding the emotions that you feel. Working on communication will be the first step to get help and be of service to others at the same time.